Thursday, April 19, 2007

Please believe me when I tell you this is bad behavior

Well, Manther and I had quite a morning. She was a brat extraodinaire at the daycare drop off. This drop off has been getting worse and worse over the past two months. Nothing external has changed. She has been in the same daycare since she was four months old and the caregivers are quite consistent. However, she has started hanging on me and refusing to remove her coat and insisting on a pacifier and (the straw that broke the camel's back) insisting on keeping her own stuffed animals with her.

I know to the unskilled observer this might look like separation anxiety and, initially, I thought that's what it was. I slowed down and was very gentle and took my time letting her warm up to the environment before I left. This was okay for a week or two, but every accommodation I made was met with a new stubborn action. I give an inch, Manther takes a mile. I believe she is manipulating the situation (yes I do believe a two year old can manipulate) and I am quite sick of it. The caregivers are looking sideways at me and I know they are wondering what the heck I am doing wrong. They keep saying, "She's so well behaved while she is here." Apparently, this is code for, "What sort of crappy parenting makes a kid act like that?" The truth is Manther always behaves for other people. She saves all her rebellion for me. The little darling.

Well, she pushed me to the edge this morning and I left angry with a flushed face. This will not happen again. No stuffed animals will accompany us to daycare even if that means I have to drag her into the car kicking and screaming. I intend to walk into the room, fill out the necessary paperwork, stick lunch in the fridge, give a quick kiss goodbye, and walk out the door again. She is welcome to sit in the middle of the room with her coat on and scream for the next 8 hours. As long as she works through it by thte time I show up to pick her up, I'm okay with it.


brooke said...

I hear you on this one. Charley saves her 'best' (read:worst) behaviour for Mommy. Seriously. I think all kids do it, but GEEZ! Thanks for stopping by, and be glad your baby girl doesn't know the frightful meaning of the word Doodlebop!

Trudging said...

My son went through a couple of stages like that. He was fine being dropped at daycare and then all of a sudden it was like I was dropping him off at Satan's. Anyhow, it passed.

lushgurl said...

A friend of mine (the Maven) has to drop her four year old off at "I-hate-school" every morning...I only laugh because I remember the difficulties associated with our little ones' knowing what works to get us feeling guilty, insecure, crazy!!! I'd like to say it gets better, but I am dealing with an almost 16 year old, I can actually SEE the grey hairs sprouting *sproing...sproing* LOL
It sounds like you are dealing with it well, setting limits is tough huh?
HUGS, and a cup of herbal tea, for your nerves!

Roz said...

Hey my little one is two years two months and recently for whatever reason if I leave a room that he is in, he tries to drag me back, if I'm in the kitchen for too long, he grabs my hand and pulls me to come and sit next to him... this is all rather unusual to me and like you I have no idea what's happening... maybe it's just a phase little tots go through, at least I'm hoping! Will keep you posted

Omara said...

Oh dear! Try talking to her about it the day before to prepare her for the drop off. Just tell her what's going to happen and how you want her to behave. Heck! It might work! LOL!