And the answer is...

This is a sidewalk chalk original that was a gift to me from Lila, the 10 year old who lives down the block. The older girls on the block came over to play with Manther today and they were so excited about the sidewalk chalk. It's from Crayola and it's shaped like eggs. They told me it was cool. It may be the only cool thing I've ever done.
As long as we're on the topic of me not being cool, I have to share something. When I did a meme a few days ago I revealed that Nael is not my real name. A couple people asked what my real name is and why I picked Nael. My real name is Sarah, but I was concerned about anonymity when I started this blog so I used a pen name. I guess I'm still a bit concerned about anonymity, but I'm sure this won't allow anyone to identify me because there are a lot of sarahs out there. The nerdy thing is how I picked 'Nael'. It's a bit unlikely because I think it's an male irish name and I am neither male nor irish. I took the words sober and clean and I spelled them backwards and came up with Nael C. Robes. After sharing this, you are probably wondering if I am a pathetic 10 year old and whether I spend my spare time writing my first name next to the last name of hot celebrities so I can see how my name will look after we get married. I am not 10 years old, but I might still occasionally think about marrying a celebrity if my husband kicked off. You are definitely not reading a cool person's blog.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

A beautiful summer night

I just spent a few minutes on the patio with hubby enjoying a summer night. The moon is full and the air is thick and it felt magical. He must have felt the same way because he looked at me and asked, "Do you have any idea how lucky we are?" He listed his gratitudes and I agreed with every one.
The attitude of gratitude was prompted by more than just the summer air. Hubby had just returned from a job site where I had also been helping move appliances. The site is a condo that is being sold to a young couple. The previous owner/landlord is replacing floors and painting as part of the rent to own agreement. My husband sold the floors and the installation is half done. The owner is already finding every possible thing to complain about. There are smudges on the wall here and a hairline fracture in the molding behind the door and he was quite certain that scratch wasn't here before the installation started. The young couple doesn't seem particularly concerned with any of these things, but that doesn't relax the owner's attitude at all. He even tried to micromanage the relocation and hook-up of the appliances, something my husband and the young man are experienced in and the owner has probably never really done.
Finally, we made it out of there and home to the patio to relax. Hubby could have been miserable and I would have forgiven him after dealing with that wretched little jerk for 2 hours, but instead he was grateful. After he shared his gratitudes, he told me it didn't matter how much money the owner of that condo had. He was obviously a miserable man and Hubby was glad he didn't have that life. I completely agree.
TAGS:
marriage family home

A sea of gratitude for the anonymous lady at CVS

My husband and I planned all sorts of home improvements and repairs for Memorial Day weekend. We did a respectable job of getting things accomplished despite the distraction of Manther being a whiny, clingy, obstinate, two year old terror. By Monday afternoon, I was worn out. But, we still had one very important job to complete. When we moved into this house, my mother-in-law gave us her old living room furniture to replace the nasty, beat-up, sectional we had. That was three years ago and we never managed to move it to our house. The move was finally going to happen on Monday. As we struggled to squeeze the couch through the doorway of the spare bedroom it was stored in, Manther had a meltdown and gave repeated loud, piercing screams for 5 minutes. It was impossible for us to continue moving furniture with that racket so I took a few minutes to calm her down. I soon realized a pacifier was absolutely necessary for us to complete this move and I had not brought one. We drove to CVS and Manther spotted her 'noogies' as soon as we entered the baby aisle. I snatched them off the shelf and quickly paid. She was begging and insisting so I opened the package as soon as we stepped out the door. The silence that followed was heavenly.

We returned to my mother-in-law's house and I started to exit the car. I couldn't find my wallet anywhere and I felt rising panic. The neighborhoods surrounding my mother-in-law's have seen a lot of poverty and drugs in recent years and the CVS I had visited was in a ghetto. I could not recall what I had done with my wallet, but I was certain that I would be robbed if I left it anywhere near that store. My husband had just given me money for bills and there was $600 in the wallet. I was in tears. My husband and I (and Manther who is now totally silent and quite interested in mommy's meltdown) raced back to the store. As we pulled in the driveway, I saw a woman standing in front of the store with my wallet in her hands. She had found it sitting on the trash can and was wondering whether to take it back into the store. All of my cash was still in it. I thanked her several times and I wanted to hug her, but I didn't want to scare her with my drama. It would have taken my husband and I a month to replace that money and it would have been a financial burden for that month and probably the next. I was convinced we would never find that wallet and, if we did, it wouldn't have any cash in it. I am so grateful to the anonymous woman for her honesty and I pray that I an always be that honest, also.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Evidence for expression of my genes...finally

Manther has always favored her father and his side of the family. She looks like him and acts like him. They share favorite foods, a wide instep, and a predisposition for cold sores. That's the short list. Everyday we find a new characteristic she and her father share and sometimes I feel like the outsider. I had my day on Saturday. We lost electricity and went to McDonald's for lunch. She can't eat at McDonald's because the allure of the play area is too overwhelming, so she ate when we got home. I put some ketchup on a plate so she could dip her fries and nuggets and left the room to do laundry (what else?). When I returned, she was face first in the ketchup licking it from the plate. This is my little sister's signature move and definitely a contribution from my gene pool. I guess she is half mine after all!

TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

10 things you never cared to know about Nael

I got this one from girl and I have to list 10 things about myself. I had a lot of trouble coming up with 10 things I haven't talked about already in this blog. I've been pretty open and I just don't have that much going on in my life that is interesting. Here's my best effort.

1) I'm a P. K. That means pastor's kid. My Dad is a retired Lutheran minister.

2) I haven't lived at home full time since I was 14. I went to boarding school and I would come back to visit over summer and vacation, but I never lived at home during the school year.

3) I screw up plane tickets terribly. I can purchase them correctly, but I can't read them. In the first big screw up, I showed up for departure when the plane was landing at it's destination. The second big screw up I showed up at the wrong airport. I now have someone review my ticket with me after I purchase it so I know where to show up and when.

4) I was told I would not be able to conceive without the aid of medication when I was 17. They were wrong.

5) This one I think everyone probably knows. Nael is not my real name.

6) I have freakishly skinny ankles...and very broad shoulders...so I sort of look like a triangle upside down. I probably shouldn't wear capri's, but I do.

7) I was engaged to another man about 7-8 years ago. It fell through because we both got strung out on drugs.

8) I have never lived outside of Michigan, but I have lived in about 6 cities in Michigan. I always thought I would leave Michigan after college and live in a big city like Chicago or New York.

9) I love to mow lawns. We did it all the time as kids for extra money and I find it very soothing. I mow our lawn all the time, but I have not told my husband I enjoy it and I never will.

10) I look more attractive with a baseball cap than without. I have a big head and big hair and the cap sort of makes the hair smaller.

Well, I hope that entertained and informed. Now to pass this little gem on. How about Tab and Christine?

My laundry basket overfloweth

If shorts and T-shirts are half the size of sweaters and jeans, why does the laundry basket fill 3 times faster in warm weather than it does in cold weather? I washed darks on Sunday and this was staring me in the face when I came home from work today. I think the laundry procreates when I'm gone at work because the pile didn't look this big in the morning.
TAGS:
family home

Gold Star

I've talked a lot about my recovery on this blog, but I don't often mention how hard Hubby has worked to get sober again. About two years ago, Hubby relapsed after 14 years sober. A few months previous, hubby had a car accident that left him unemployed with a disabling back injury. Along with these challenges, there were consequences from law enforcement and child protective services following the relapse. He did everything he was told to do. He dropped all painkillers except for ibuprofen and forced himself to outpatient therapy, meetings, parenting classes, and doctor's appointments for almost 6 months. He stuck it out through surgery and rehab and gave up his installation business and interviewed for jobs. He has been at his new job 14 months and he just received his 3rd raise yesterday (yeah!) because he has worked hard to become an outstanding employee and (in my opinion) quite a salesman. On top of all this, he's moonlighting as an installer every chance he gets to bring extra money in. I'm very proud of his amazing progress in the program and in life and so grateful for effort he makes to build a future for us.
TAGS:
marriage family home

Your mama is so big...

My husband stole one of the promotional balloons from a sale at work and brought it home. It is gigantic and Manther loves it. Manther only completes about 1 night a week in her own bed (major bad habit that her parents are slacking on), so, when Manther moved to our bed, the balloon spent the night with us, too. I woke up staring at this monstrous blue circle and my first thought was a line I heard at a comedy show, "Your mama is so big she has her own moon." I guess it's time to go on a diet.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Tag from A to Z

Toni tagged me with this a few days ago and I put it off until Friday. Here goes nothing.

A- Attached or Single? Umm, married. Attached sounds like something you do with a part of your body.

B- Best Friend- IRL, Lisa and Amie. They were in transitional housing with me for a year and they are still sober and my buddies. They were there to pick up the pieces when I had a wedding the weekend of no electricity, they helped the nurse give my daughter her first bath, and they babysat and gave support when hubby relapsed. They are my lifeline.

C- Cake or Pie- Cheesecake...is that cake or pie? With strawberries in sauce and real whipping cream on top. YUMMMM.

D- Drink of choice- Used to by anything with alcohol. Nowadays I won't even drink too much caffeine. I love and embrace my lameness. The answer is: fruit punch juicy juice, straight, undiluted.

E- Essential Items- Phone, wallet, keys. The three things I pat myself down for every time I leave the house.

F- Favorite color- green, lots of different shades of it.

G- Gummi Bears or Worms- I'm with Toni. I'm not really into the gummi thing. Chocolate or hard candy.

H- Hometown- I call Ann Arbor my hometown. I can't afford to live there, but I live close and I feel safest when I am there.

I- Indulgence- Ice cream. So fattening, but I still do it. Breyer's, usually dark cherry with chocolate.

J- January or February?- February. January is way too long.

K- Kids- 1 girl. Working on number two. My husband has to learn how to get home before 10 pm so we can work on number 2.

L- Life is incomplete without- sobriety, family, friends. In that order.

M- Marriage Date- August 16, 2003. The weekend the electricity went out in the eastern quadrant. See 'U'.

N-Number of Siblings- Two sisters, one brother. All are fantastic people. My sisters are the other end of my lifeline.

O- Oranges or Apples?- Apples, oranges get all over when you peel them and you smell citrusy for the rest of the day.

P- Phobias/Fears- Flying things, birds and bats, especially in enclosed spaces.

Q- Favorite Quote- Alexander Graham Bell, “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”

R- Reason to Smile- I am sober today.

S- Seasons- Fall, I am too pale for summer, intolerant of the bitter winter temps, and there's always a lot of work to do in spring. Also, fall clothes are the cutest.

T- Tags- This is a bit tricky, I don't want to screw up the format of anybody's blog (like Trudging's gratitude list). How about Lushgirl and A. J. Reams?

U- Unknown fact about me- Two days before my wedding, the largest blackout in North America occurred. This is now known as Northeast Blackout of 2003. There was no gas or air conditioning until about 10 hours before the ceremony. I was a wreck. But, everyone was able to gas up in time to get there (even my parents coming to MI from Toronto) and we took what we could get for flowers and menu. I guess it worked because we're still married.

V- Vegetarian or oppressor of animals? Meat, I love meat. I even worked in a few butcher shops.

W- Worse Habit- The snooze alarm. I just hate being woken up in the morning.

X-X-rays or ultrasounds- I don't really have a strong preference here. I guess you don't have to drink gallons of water for an X-ray so I prefer those.

Y- Your Favorite Food- There are so many. I guess a really good hoagie.

Z- Zodiac- Saggitarius

Thanks Toni! I hope you have a great weekend away!

The best job of all

Last night was meeting night and I am pleased to say that I was able to feel pretty comfortable at my table again. I am learning names and faces and I don't feel like a stranger in a foreign land. The table was about resentments and many shared about resentments related to their jobs. I heard about condescending bosses and demanding customers and backstabbing coworkers. I was filled with gratitude because I have an awesome job today.

Before recovery, I had a high-stress, big-money pharmaceutical job. I lost it due to crappy using behavior and it was one of my drunken regrets. In the back of my mind, I intended to return to that type of job when I was sober enough to handle the stress. Barely employable in early sobriety, I took whatever job came along, short order cook at Bill Knapp's, meat counter at Meijer (I really liked this job and almost stayed), and cashier at the local Alano Club (terrible, cruel, condescending boss, lots of 13 steppers, not all things recovery are good). After two years of sobriety, my sponsor told me I could move on and put in resumes related to my previous career.

I left a big black mark on my record in the pharmaceutical industry, so I applied at the local academic research institution initially. I was given a chance by a kind MD/professor and worked hard for him. I continued to watch the job openings and, almost a year after he hired me, I got an interview at a pharmaceutical company. I really thought this was where I was supposed to be and I was crushed when I was not offered the job. I worked through it with the help of the program and got comfortable with the job I had. We bought a house and got pregnant and, in my 3rd month, I found out our project had lost funding.

I was really shaken and more than a little bit angry. Why would God refuse me the tasty pharmaceutical job and also take away my humble academic position? I am the primary income and insurance carrier in our little family. I had a baby on the way and had no choice but to interview with my protruding belly. I was hired by the most amazing boss ever. She is a pediatric MD, a surgeon, a researcher, and mother of 4. She is one of the smartest people I have ever met, yet she respects my opinion and decisions and is grateful for the work I do. My first year working for her, I missed time for childbirth, my husband's car accident, back injury, relapse related court dates and parenting classes, and back surgery. On top of all this, Manther was diagnosed with 5 earaches her first year in daycare and I had to drag her out of daycare and to the doc's numerous times. I was ashamed of my trailer trash life and all the work I missed, but I tried to stay on top of things and be focused at work. She never criticized me or questioned all the personal time, but instead told me I was doing a great job and gave me a merit raise.

There is nothing I dread about coming into work and I could never have picked a job that allows me to split my time between mother, wife, and employee. God had to pick this job for me. That pharmaceutical job I wanted? That company shut it's doors this year and I would have been standing in an unemployment line if I had gotten my way 3 years ago. I am so grateful God took care of me and put me where I am today. I only wish I had been more accomodating while he was working things out for me.
TAGS:
alcoholism addiction 12-step aa alcoholics anonymous family

Cats and Dogs

This is not mine. It got forwarded to me via email yesterday and it made me laugh. I hope it does the same for you.
First, A Dog's Diary:
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

"Excerpts from a Cat's Diary" Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

Happy Middle of the Week!
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Catchin Coons

Two posts in one day! I'm posting again because I'm a bit concerned about my folks. They are willful senior citizens, as many senior citizens are, and they frequently think the rules (laws) don't apply to them. They have had a raccoon with babies living in the walls of their condo for a few weeks. The critter company has been trying for 10 days to catch it. I got this email today.

'We now know why the raccoon moved to the wall between the liv. room and bedroom. Scott from ###### placed the trap right up against the opening where the coon went in. It had no choice but to enter the trap. So the smart little devil was working on another opening. Don't know if she was successful. I made a bed in the study with couch cushions and closed the door. Dad said from time to time the noice and banging would wake him. My imagination ran away with me and I tho't I smelled sawdust in our bedroom.

Dad is oiling his gun.'


Perhaps some of you think I gun is an okay idea in this situation. I assure you it is not. My father's gun is older than I am and I have only seen him use it once about 15 years ago. He has lost 75% of his sight since then and I am pretty convinced he won't be a good shot. This is a condominium community, not the plains of Montana. You can't just open fire whenever you think it's appopriate. What the hell. I wrote them back and asked them to come stay with me for a while rather than resort to gunfire. I hope that stupid coon enters the trap before my parents get arrested. I really don't want to read about this on the front page of the paper.

Whining

Oh yeah, I'm doing it. I have to go to a birthday party tonight. For a nephew and a mother-in-law. I have to go to a potluck tomorrow. For a coworker. All are nice people, but I want to frolick and bike ride and run through the thick, lush spring grass with my daughter. I don't want to spend my precious and limited time after work going to parties and making pasta dishes. Okay, enough whining. I am an adult and therefore must accept a serious reduction in frolicking time. I will dutifully go to Meijer's and proceed with wrapping gifts and cooking. Yuck.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Party Favors

I got to see my sister this weekend. We behaved in a very juvenile manner and it was fun. We were reliving her baby shower and laughing at her mother-in-law. My mother, who refuses to say anything bad about anyone no matter how much fun it might be, says that my sister's MIL is a very 'focused' and 'directed' person. My sister uses other words to describe her. Her MIL is excited about the baby and did a lot of work for the shower. She enjoys crafts and usually makes some very nice stuff (well, not as nice as girl's, but still decent). She went to all the work to paint faces and embroider hats and make lace thingys for these little doll heads. I think she made about 30 of them. But, they have no body and they are freaky looking. I don't know exactly what they are. The MIL called them an 'ornament'. They look more like an unattached head to me. My sister and I had to try and keep a straight face as we set a bodyless doll at each place setting. The worst part is that the heads were stored in these egg cartons. While 1 of these looks a little freaky, 12 of them perched at angles in an egg carton was hysterical. My mother was hissing at us under her breath as we tried to suppress our giggles. The truth is I cannot do crafts AT ALL. I nearly failed 'art' in grade school and sewing is like torture for me. So, do I have the right to laugh? Not at all. It was terrible behavior, but you just can't be good all the time.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

He cars and she cars

Manther is a tomboy and really enjoys vehicles. 'Car' was a word she learned early on and shortly after that she started referring to my sedan as 'mama car' and her father's van as 'dada car'. When we went for walks, she would point out other sedans and say 'mama car' or 'dada car' when large square vehicles drove by. I acknowledged what she was saying by repeating, "Yes, that does look like mama's car." or "Yes, a van just like dada's." Slowly, her language skills are improved and she pointed out trucks and motorcycles. Despite her improved vocabulary, she continues to call smaller sedans and compacts 'mama car' and larger vans and minivans 'dada car'. A she talked more and more about these cars and vans, I began to realize the 'mama' and 'dada' indicate that she has assigned them a gender and I have reinforced this by agreeing with her for the past 6 months. Apparently, all smaller, low-to-ground vehicles are feminine and taller square vehicles are masculine. Trucks and motorcycles are outlyers right now. I don't really know how to correct this situation, or if I need to. I think the vehicles in 'Cars' had a gender. Weren't some of those feminine? So, I guess I'll let her go on thinking there are 'he' cars and 'she' cars. I think men have been assigning a gender to their vehicles for decades and it doesn't appear to have screwed them up. Or has it?
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Nael finally has a meeting

Yes, it's true. I went to my Wednesday night meeting and I was sort of comfortable for the first time in suburban AA. I knew almost everyone at the table and it was suggested I lead. Last time this was suggested, I led with the format that is typically used at that meeting, i.e. lots of table leader feedback, and it felt awkward and uncomfortable. This time I decided to just do it the way I was comfortable. We shared around the table and I shared last and I think everyone, including me, thought it was a good table. Whew! I might be able to get some recovery in the suburbs yet.
The downer is that a very active, long-time member of AA in our community has lost his job. It was quite a good job and he is taking it hard. Jobs are so scarce in this state and I would be surprised if he is able to find employment without relocating. If he leaves the state, he leaves behind a daughter who lives with his ex-wife. I am sure he will still get visits with her, but they will probably go from once a week to once every 6 months. Everyone please send M your prayers so he can make it through this and still remain an active part of his daughter's life.
TAGS:
alcoholism addiction 12-step aa alcoholics anonymous

The Baby Shower

My sister's baby shower was this weekend and I think everyone had a nice time. I come from a long line of loud, gregarious, talk-with-your-hands, say-what's-on-your-mind women and most of them showed up for the shower. The family of the father-to-be walked in, said 'hello', and politely took their seats. They chatted pleasantly and snacked until game time when they listened and played along. My family walked in and spent an inordinately long time greeting each other with big hugs and kisses. They walked around and snacked and conversed loudly with hand gestures until we SUGGESTED they sit so we could start the games. They rearranged chairs so no one could tell whose door prize belonged to who and had animated conversations the entire time we were conducting games. No one won anything because I don't think anyone was actually participating in the games. Finally, we surrendered to the chaos and handed everyone a prize and told my sister to start opening gifts. I am making fun of my family, but I am proud to be one of them. They are a group of sympathetic, smart, strong individuals and I think these are all admirable characteristics. I'll continue to enjoy their antics, even if family gatherings feel a like being trapped in a room with 20 agitated cockatoos.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

Grass...no, not that kind

I was driving by our city buildings yesterday and something caught my eye. No, it was not the building itself, although I am startled by the ostentatious glass structure set in the middle of what was recently a cornfield. I focused on one of the blurbs in the prominent, lit-up, scrolling sign that reads, “Keep it neat! Grass should be no higher than 5 inches.” This bothers me on several levels. I am very American in that I hate it when the government regulates any part of my life that I feel they have no business in. I definitely think they crossed that boundary when they give me suggestions on the length of a proper lawn. The other thing that nagged me is the suggested length, 5 inches. I think my lawn is 5 inches long when I finish cutting it, not when I decide to cut it. This is ‘setting the bar high’, even for the suburbs. So, here’s MY suggestion. Let’s not worry about the length of the lawn because that’s really not hurting anybody. Instead, let’s work on the dangerously aggressive mode of driving that is fashionable in my burb. If we can convince the SUV and minivan drivin’ mamas to view a human life as equal to getting Bobby and Sue to soccer practice on time, we might actually create a safer place to live.
TAGS:
marriage family home home repair

MIA

I haven't been posting much the past few days. I feel (and look) like ICK from a nasty cold Manther brought home from daycare. Manther and hubby and I are all stuck in the ICK and the theme at our house is short tempered irritability with lots of crying and whining. My husband is the one doing most of the crying and whining. Manther has decided to get as many waking hours as possible with the ICK and only sleeps about 6 hours a night. These hours are not consecutive. I was feeling like a wimp, but then I came into work and saw a coworker who also has the ICK. I am not mentally exaggerating how crappy I look because she was stumbling around wearing a thick sweater and a pale face with sunken eyes and a puffy, red nose. I could totally relate and am wearing the same sweater and face. So, lots of fluids and rest and I hope to post something more upbeat tomorrow.
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents

I am a super-genius

I have not only managed to add a banner to my blog (thanks to tips for new bloggers), but I also made a web page for my profile and linked to it. Click on my profile and see for yourself. I realized these are remedial skills for the average blogger, but I am not your average blogger. I fall someplace below average. Okay, that was a lot of thinking for me and I am blog-tired. See ya tomorrow.

On bad bedside manner

Manther had her two year check-up yesterday and I had a special problem I wanted to point out to the doctor. Manther has an intermittent lazy eye that she inherited from my husband's side of the family. I first noticed it a few months ago and immediately went to the internet because I wanted to confirm that some latent virus had not gone beserk and attacked her neurological system. I did research and more or less excluded this possibility and also found intermittent lazy eyes do not usually affect sight, especially at 2 years old. Based on this, I decided to wait until her two year check up to point it out to the doctor and proceed with treatment.
During the appointment yesterday, the doctor asked if I noticed anything unusual and I mentioned the eye.

Her reply, "I'm SO glad you brought that up. That's SO important." I started to reply and was cut off.

"That HAS to be looked at. If this is not treated while she if young, the brain could shut down in that area. Do you know what that means?" I start to reply and I am cut off.

"She could go BLIND in that eye. If the brain shuts down in that area, she'll be BLIND in one eye. Now, I know you can live with one eye, but do you want that for her?" I stop trying to reply and start suppressing a smirk. The doctor sees that I am trying not to laugh at her because I am thinking of 'A Christmas Story' and 'you'll poke your eye out' and she takes it down a notch.

"I know losing sight at this age is not likely, but if this goes untreated that could happen."

Can someone tell me at what point in time during this appointment I denied that my child had a medical condition or refused treatment? Here's a word of advice to the pediatricians out there: it's a bit upsetting for parents to be told their children are going blind, so maybe that shouldn't be EM-PHA-SIZED unless necessary. If you enjoy watching a mother weeping and clutching her chest in the examination room while begging for immediate surgery to save her poor baby's eye, then this is definitely the approach you want to take. However, if you would like everyone to remain sane during the appointment, how about responding with, "I'm glad you brought that up. I'm going to give you a referral to ophthalmology and they can tell you how to proceed." Jeesh!
TAGS:
family parenting mom kids parents