My Christmas Tree Smells Like a Head Shop

I decorated a Christmas tree the past several days and today I woke up and noticed a heavy, musty, somewhat sultry odor in my living room. I was more than a little disturbed and I sniffed all the objects in the living room until I found the source, my Christmas tree. I purchased garland, lights, and a snow blanket at a Christmas store and I think this was an error in judgement. The store changes with the seasons. Over the past several months it’s been a Halloween store, a Thanksgiving store, and now a Christmas store. No matter what the season, it has bright floor tiles in primary colors because in it’s previous life it was a laser tag/fun zone for kids’ birthday parties. I have to admire the entrepreneur for exploiting the shopping season so efficiently, but at the same time I question whether he should be burning that incense that we all associate with things that are definitely not Christmasy. I saw the person I would presume is the owner behind the counter and he also did not look very Christmasy. He looked like he would have been more comfortable filming gay porn. The question I am asking myself today is this, “Why did I purchase Christmas decorations that smell of freaky sex from a man who looked like he films freaky sex?” I have no answer. However, I must have enjoyed the smell in the store on some level in because the odor did not seem unusual or offensive until today.
In case anyone is waiting for an update, the organism living in my husband is slowly exiting his body. The prescription cream is working and the bug is moving on. So, I guess my husband is not secret agent man, or he’s onto me and administered the antidote to himself rather than reveal his true identity. I did ask him for a picture of the ‘ring’ for my blog yesterday. Maybe that tipped him off….
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